What is beautiful?

I hate:
-that my dad is gone for two weeks
-that my voice teacher is moving in two weeks
-that i cannot show the last 25 entries (it keeps switching back to five)
-feeling not good enough
-the feeling of rejection
-feeling damn unpretty
-the feeling of almost getting kissed, and then not
-feeling that people dont want you around
-the feeling of my sunburn!

why is everything so confusing?
why do i feel like hitting my head against the wall?
what is wrong with me?
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!